Thursday, December 25, 2008

Close to tears

Prayer: We made it through the Snowpocolypse tm. to St. James for a very beautiful Mass, where TEYO sang and TTYO was a peaceful and darling addition to our prayer. The greatest gift I received during that hour was the 15 minutes or so where she let Miss Amy hold her and I actually had a few moments of silent prayer. Yes, as Miss T said, that was one of the few times in the past 3 years.

Friends: After Mass we spent time at the godparents' home, opening gifts, eating pasta, drinking refreshments, and singing a few songs. That was a very nice time, especially since this was our original plan a few weeks ago, but the Snowpocolypse had put our plans in jeopardy. Ah, for the Subaru!

Family: We (I) cancelled the Christmas trek to B'ham due to Snowpocolypse, and received little to no guilt trip from the parental units. Of course, I did have to lay one on myself a bit, because, you know, you just have to.

Christmas Morning: TEYO woke us at 6 a.m. (!) wanting to open stockings, this of course was not a granted request and she climbed in bed and we slept til 8. Then, being the evil mother I am, TEYO had to wait until TTYO woke up (!) and then we had our traditional "emptying of the stockings in Mom and Dad's bed." That was as fun as usual. Presents, coffee, and a yummy breakfast rounded off the morning.

More Friends: the afternoon was spent at Miss Amy's house where we had a "No Grown Up" Christmas. Things were all well until it seemed that our friend who had delivered her baby yesterday called with a medical emergency. Miss A rushed off as the rest of us stopped in our tracks, praying for a true Christmas miracle but feeling very, very worried and sad.
Fortunately, things were not as bad as they seemed. The prayers are continuing. Given my story, this is all very difficult. All of the PTSD shit comes up and I never want my feelings about another's trauma to look like I am making it all about me.

So The Tears: I think Christmas is just plain tricky for me. Probably it is for lots of people for all kinds of reasons. The tears, I'm sure, come from childhood crap, financial stress about wanting to give my spouse, kids, and friends everything with the stark realization that that is just not in the cards right now, the &*^%# Snowpocolypse, baby worries, and exhaustion.

This is the birth of our Savior, I will never let that fact escape me. I have had enough therapy to know that all of those other feelings are not to be ignored and the Infant was born to help me navigate through all of that which can so easily get in the way of Him.

Monday, December 22, 2008

It's so annoying

So I venture out into the snow-filled streets today to go to the gym. I love my family and all but, dang, I needed to get out of the house. I'm in the locker room and over hear a conversation that I had to bite my lip to avoid lol.

Girl One: "Yeah, I heard about those Body Buggs, but they seem like they would make me psychotic, counting my calories all time, it would like be so annoying."
Girl Two: "Yeah, being psychotic is so annoying"
Girl One: "Yeah, I was like really psychotic last summer, and it just wasn't working out for me".
Girl Two: "Yeah, I know."

Friday, December 19, 2008

Sleeps in Santa Hat

Mrs. Berry: Well, it seems that Christmas Break is finally here. There were three snow days this week. Well actually, one "it might really snow, so we better not open school" day. It was a bit disappointing because I was not able to finish recording my students work for their Christmas CD's we were making. I guess they will be New Year's CDs instead. The snow days have, however, given me the time to finish Christmas baking, creating and mailing out the thank you notes for TTYO's birthday presents nearly finish mailing out Christmas cards and nearly finishing the mounting of the cross-stitch Advent Calendar I started a year ago (pictures to come).

Yesterday it snowed all day and the neighbors came over for a bbq last night. The DH ran the bbq and made the most delicious (as always) burgers.

Today TEYO is over at Miss Ruby's, TTYO is "napping", and the DH ventured into work. Silence abounds for mama.

Sunday evening has been reserved for St. James Lesson and Carols concert. I hope that Jeff Renner is wrong again so that the show is not cancelled.

Gratitude: for a dog who loves to walk in the snow, the Dog Whisperer who reminds me that dogs live in the moment and are not, in fact, humans and need be treated as such, and an eleven year old who sleeps in her Santa Hat.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Sometimes it's best to just shut up.

Mosaics: Sunday was the Advent Fair and it went surprisingly well. I know that my art should stand alone, regardless of the opinion of others, but gee it it sure is keen to have strangers like it and whats more, cough up some cash.

Movies and books: Watched the very scary "The Exorcism of Emily Rose" the other night. Very creepy and what's more based on a true story.
I am half-way through "The Discovery of Heaven" and it is definitely kicking along! One of the characters got axed, which was a complete surprise and a bit sad. There is a surprising amount of sex in this book, which is not necessarily a bad thing.
"Get out of my life, but first will you drive Cheryl and I to the Mall" has become my "what to read on the elliptical trainer, when Oprah isn't on the tv" at the gym. The latest sage advice for parents of teenagers is "sometimes it's best to just shut up".

Mrs. B: My kids are so talented!! I cannot wait to share their holiday marimba work on my website. On the opposite end of the scale, however, it is ironic (or is it) that those classes who have the most behavior problems also seem to be the classes who struggle the most with playing as an ensemble.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

I will NOT be three.

Mommy: The Three-Year Old's (ttyo) birthday party! Though ttyo is completely reluctant to be 3. She seems to think that this now requires a great deal of responsibility, such as peeing on the potty and picking up after herself. Both girls got new haircuts. Ttyo's first, by the way, and she was VERY reluctant. TEYO's is very nice too, and I actually caught her parting her hair with a comb and brushing it WITHOUT being asked. I am frequently struck by how beautiful my girls are.

Movies and books: Almost through the latest X-Files movie. Quite disappointing. Can we please get off the story line of Mulder working through his sister's abduction! PLEASE! I liked it much better when he was into porn and eating sunflower seeds.
I'm on pg. 260+ of the large tome. Seems that two higher-beings are watching the antics and creating life situations of the two main characters. They are also dissing Satan, so I assuming they are of the positive persuasion.
Speaking of persuasions, please check out "Prop 8- the Musical"on Jack Black is Jesus. Two snaps and a circle.

Mosaics: Sunday is the Advent Fair. Pray.

Mrs. B: Having a fabulous time with the new Holiday Marimba book. The overwhelming favorite is "Ukranian Bell Carol". ta, ti ti , ta.

Monday, December 1, 2008

What is that called?

Mrs. B: I don't know why, but after a four day weekend, I really lose the hang of being a teacher. Suddenly, I'm a first-year teacher on the first day. The good news is that by about the 3rd class, I got it back together, whereas a first-year teacher feels that way for the whole year! I can't remember any kid's name, couldn't even remember the word for "clipboard".

Happily recalling: TAYO's birthday party yesterday. It was quite wonderful. Many family and friends (25+) and yummy cake from Miss R. (I think a cake-war is in order for T and R!) Fun, fun presents and a little girl who was quite thrilled being at being the center of attention. The REAL birthday is tomorrow!!! Pictures to come.

Movies and books: Watched a very interesting indy-film called "Touch" about a stigmata. Christopher Walken fans should definitely take a look.
Half-way through "Get out of my life . . .". Still feeling a little sad.

Mosaics: Feeling alittle "under the gun" preparing for the Advent Fair on Sunday. Need to get it together. Saw pictures of this great mosaic-bench that had fish "with feet". May have to try that this summer.

Friday, November 28, 2008

Groovy Haircuts

Today: I am recovering from the food-coma that came from yesterday. Goodness what a lot of great food, friends and family. Miss Ruth successfully bbq'd the turkey and it was wonderful. Sean's brother, JC, and kids came over and we had a wonderful time. TEYO, is spending the night with her cousin and will be returning tomorrow. Got a very "groovy haircut" today.

Eagerly Anticipating: TATYO's 3rd B'Day party on Sunday. Hotdogs, silly hats, and Miss Ruth's chocolate cake is on the roster. Done Deal!

Books and movies: I am continuing with the "very large book"by author Harry Mulisch. It is getting more interesting. Turns out one of the characters is the son of a Nazi. I read "Get out of my life, but first will you drive me and Cheryl to the mall?" while my hair color was processing and it turns out that if TEYO is going to be a normal teenager I will have some sad and challenging moments ahead of me. I already feeling a bit like she is separating from me, and I miss her already.
I have many episodes of the "Dog Whisperer" in the queue and the DH and I may be settling in on the red couch. I can already hear the dog sighing.

Mrs. B: I am looking forward to Monday, when I get to try out my new Holiday Songs for the Marimba book by Doug Goodkin. I am anticipating some great fun.

Mosaics: The St. James Advent Bazaar is fast approaching. I need to get my @#$!& together. Feeling a little tech-challenged as I try to post pictures of my mosaics using "Flickr". Dang, I guess my master degree in technology doesn't save me from all of these challenges. If you have any advice, please send it my way.

Thursday, November 27, 2008


I am thankful for my darling husband who is exceedingly kind to me and a glorious father to our daughters.

I am thankful for my eleven-year old who is sweet and kind and funny and a patient and loving big sister.

I am thankful for my almost three year old who never fails to bring a smile, is really good at big hugs, and has a fabulous rendition of the ABC song.

I am thankful for my dog who loves to go on walks with me, always visits me in the bathroom, and always seems to sigh at the appropriate time.

I am thankful for my faith, which holds me up at the most challenging of times.

I am thankful for a job I love, a warm home, a car that runs, and money in the bank.

I am thankful for my friends who are warm and funny and creative and kind.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Why is it that. . . ?

Today: I am paying close attention to my email for status updates on my friend Stacey, who is having some complications with her pregnancy. Prayers are being sent her way.
I am also recovering from a lovely time at Miss Ruth's house, watching "Chuck" and putting up with "Dancing with the Stars" (mr. shiny). Ruthie can definitely make a very nice cocktail.
Prayers to St. Christopher as Miss T makes her way to Paris.

ATYO: Why is it that with a room full of toys nearby, the ATYO insists that emptying out the diaper bag and pulling out diaper wipes is much more interesting?

Family: looks like we are holding Thanksgiving dinner at our homestead. Miss Ruth is going to come over and GRILL our turkey. I have complete faith that the bird will be glorious, even with Sarah Palin's attempt to ruin my taste for turkey, for the rest of my life.

Mosaics and needlework: I have been working on DH's Christmas stocking. It is one of those felt/sequin jobbies that are only cool when Christmas is the theme. Pictures to come.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Okay, let's try this thing.

My first official bit of blogging!Should be interesting to see how this pans out. So far, this is my 3rd attempt this morning as the "Almost three-year old" (ATYO) has interrupted each time I try to sit down to type.
I'm going to copy Miss T's format (with her permission). If you are familiar with her blog. she keeps subjects in categories and tends to not go on too much. I don't know about you, but I have a trick of a time reading large blocks of text on-line. So, I'll be posting bits about my life as a mom of two, the darling husband (DH), the dog, my work as an elementary music teacher (a job I love), my faith and my Church, books, movies, mosaics, needlework and what ever else seems to come up.
I hope you enjoy and will post comments.

Today: I am home with the dog and the ATYO while the DH is at Church. On a normal Sunday, all 4 of us would be at Church but last night was special as the eleven year-old (EYO) and I sang at Blessed Sacrament Church with our dear friends Amy and Ruby. I just love seeing my daughter and Ruby as they grow into their musicianship! Ruby even was brave to attempt to sing the harmony part with her mom, and did a fine job, I must say!
In the front pew of the church was a young man who was obviously afflicted with autism or Asberger syndrome. I don't know which. He was thoroughly enjoying Mass with his incredibly patient mother. It was so obvious that without a medical miracle (can you say "stem cell research?") he will never be able to lead an independent life and may never get beyond the mental/behavioral capacity of a three year old. Needless to say, I am counting my blessings that I have two healthy children.

Books and movies: I am reading a very large book called "The Discovery of Heaven". It's a translation of a German work by author Harry Mulisch. I am only into page 60 of 500(!) and character development is still taking place. I'll keep you informed. I rarely have two books going on at the same time, but I did pick up a copy of "Get out of my life, but first will you drive me and Cheryl to the mall?". It's a book on the parenting of teenagers. Though the EYO is not causing me any grief that is beyond the range of normal, I thought I would pre-educate myself. It is a very funny book but also very wise, I think.
Last night the DH and I watched handsome Denzel Washington in the movie an "American Gangster". I give it three out of four "mommies". Well acted and thankfully didn't glamorize the devistating impact of organized crime and the evils of heroin addicition.

Mrs. B: As I mentioned before, I love my job as an elementary music teacher. I've been going at it for eleven years now and I still can't believe that I get paid to do what I love. However, there are moments where those Gosh Darn Kids (GDK) drive me to a large glass, or two, of red wine. But watcha gonna do?

Mosaics: I am steadily adding to the inventory of pieces I am going to have for sale at the St. James Advent Bazaar. 5 crosses, 2 small birdhouses, 2 large birdhouses, and a box with a Koi Pond theme. Maybe I'll get around to posting images, who knows.